I miss my 'sickle.

One of the most fun activities on this trip was renting motorbikes. I loved my 'sickle and miss it immensely. Every day I would pop into a motorbike rental place and check the prices for renting a bike and I had spent two or three days eyeing off the traffic around Patong, trying to convince myself that I could cope with it. Except the problem was, that I didn't have a motorbike license and did not really know how to ride. Well, that changes pretty quickly in Thailand...

After enough self-talk and annoying the crew with "I am gonna get a bike" talk, I needed action and marched on down the road to the first rental place I could find. There was a little kid sitting next to two bikes and I ask, "How much?" He says "Que?" I think to myself, oh this is going to be a long day...

But I persevere with the kid (I cant remember his name) and we finally got to an agreeable price which I knew I could get on every other street corner. He pulls out an agreement form for me to fill out. I start penning it out and get to a section where it asks for a Passport number. SHIT! How annoying. I have to go back to my hotel to get my passport when I am sooo bloody close. Anyway, I think to myself, "Hold on, if just keep going and give him back the form, maybe he won't ask for it?" He points to the passport column just as I am thinking this. Right then. I try to communicate again. "I GO TO HOTEL TO GET PASSPORT" I say looking flustered, pointing and gesticulating like a mad bloody tourist who didn't bother to learn a single word of Thai... After a minute he understands and grabs me the spiffy little helmet you can see here and starts up the bike for me. "Que?" I say. Poor little kid must be getting over this too...

His understanding is that I want to take the bike back to the hotel, get my passport and complete the deal - and furthermore, he wants to jump on the back of the bike and come with me! WHAT! I start shaking my head with thoughts of look boy, I am not sure you realise the predicament we will be in if we do this. I had always planned to get the bike and ride straight through the markets to the wide lanes where I know I can ride around and get used to the bike. I try to explain. Look matey, I am just gonna run up the street and get my passport. He is convinced that I want to ride there and he is coming with me.
Hmmmm...ok, fine bugger it. Lets give it a go (as my hands start to shake a little). So my first moments on a bike in real life, involve me being pillion passengered up, with a kid, without a helmet and pulling out onto one of the three main roads of Patong. Here we go.

But, we make it to the hotel without a single drama. Surprising really in that I didn't figure out where the horn or the indicators were until several hours later. I was a little anxious and nervy as we arrived, but mostly with the excitement of not maiming this kid or myself. I jogged into the room to get my passport and managed to get the reception desk to take a copy and "I'm done" and all signed up! Or so it seemed. Kid now says "We go Anon". Yes of course I say. "Que?". He gets on the bike, tells me to jump on and we start racing up the main road to a little stall where he asks for "Mr Anon" to come out from a building that looks not so nice or friendly. Mr Anon owns the bikes and the kid is just the street seller as it turns out. I should have guessed from all the Mr Anon stickers all over it... I am a getting a little weary now. But, there are no problems - Anon is a pretty good guy and we chat for a little while. Mr Anon is the one who holds deposits and passports - DEPOSITS! Bugger I forgot about that bit. He says 3000 Baht ($120) deposit. I say "Mate, I don't have it" which I did, but I was not planning to go back to the hotel to get it. He looks me up and down and says, "Ok, you ok, no problem" and throws a big smile at me and we shake hands. I love these people. This is great I am thinking, especially when I saw him put the photocopy of my passport into his bag, which contained a tonne of Baht and actual passports. I couldn't believe that people actually give up their passport to this sort of a bloke. But then I again I thought, hold on, this is Thailand and everyone has been amazing so far. Its just that kind of place where you could give your passport to someone and actually get it back it seems.

So, I have my bike and I am off. No more than literally two minutes into it, my boyish youth side comes out and I really get into the swing and flow of the traffic. This was BLOODY AMAZING - what a rush. To be a virgin to Patong roads and being protected by a helmet that was made of nothing stronger than bucket material was mind blowing. The level of concentration I was forced to employ to exude suitable awareness being a novice bike rider was phenomenal. But honestly, it felt really comfortable. I was surprised how much vision I had as well as the awareness of the other bikes and traffic around me - my endorphins and whatever other chemicals were flowing around my body, giving off an amphetamine quality level of focus with my surroundings and detail assessment. I could get used to this. Until I happen to see a mirror and understand that not only do I look like a tourist, but also like a really big bloody nerd with this helmet on. Why did Wayne get a cool one? Damn it - I am jealous as hell that next day due to Wayne's helmet. In that first day, after my confidence was at the point where I thought I could tackle anything, I started exploring all and any back streets of Patong Beach as well as riding down to Karon, the other big beach at Phuket. It is an exceedingly visceral experience to be riding around back streets of a town you have never been to before and just exploring, knowing that if something happens to you or the bike, you are going to be in for a long tough day. But to tell the truth, these thoughts did not bother me at all. It's almost as if I didn't care if something inconvenient happened, because it would serve to test my own abilities to cope with situations, when there is no one watching. No one to call, no one else to rely on. So, becoming one with the back streets of Patong I decided it was time to keep going elsewhere. I crossed the hill at the back of Patong and headed towards I don't know where. My mission was simple, ride for ages until I find some shopping centres or get freaked out and feel the need to return. Needless to say this was great, everywhere I went - on shitty roads, on main highways, on goat tracks and mountain climbs, my sweet little bike (although groaning and complaining bitterly at 105km/h) did an amazing job of keeping me safe and powering through traffic and taking me places, the likes of which I had not seen before (and where I would not dare drive a car). However, there were two times where I lost my sense of direction completely, not direction to return home, but to where I wanted to go. Both times that I stopped to check out the map, a stranger would walk over and try to help. This was amazing to me. I wasn't particularly worried about not knowing my way, but just looking for shopping centres of interest and someone would make the time to come and help. I loved this. And furthermore and moreover, all these little back streets and alleys I explored did more than just that - everytime anybody looked at me, I'd attempt a smile and every single time, the people would send one straight back at me. This is the best. How could you possibly be worried about anything, when every single person you smile at smiles back, even in the dirtiest and darkest parts. I love this.

So I continue back to the Baumanburi after hours on my bike. The entire day of riding like a tourist (i.e. gunning up mountain climbs, racing Tuk Tuks at every opportunity and powering down highways) only used half a tank of fuel. That is 60 BAHT! $2AUD! You little beauty.

So, the breakdown is:
200Baht for the bike day one
150Baht for the bike day two
180Baht altogether for two tanks of fuel
530Baht total = $19.

Nineteen dollars for two days of great fun. Beat that.

The thing now is, for anyone who reads this and says, "yeah but every body in their 20's goes to Bali and Thailand and gets a bike and does this stuff" or "this is not that big a deal", I say in response "nuts to you". I didn't know how to ride a bike before this and I had a blast. (BTW no one has actually said anything like the above yet, just trying to pre-empt)

Furthermore, if there is anyone who is really easy going and gets off on anything that's mildly interesting & living in Darwin, I have a proposition. I plan on getting a bigger bike in Singapore and doing a motorbike tour from there, up the West coast of Malaysia, through Johor Baharu, Pinang, Kuala Lumpur and then staying somewhere nice in Langkawi for a couple of Days. Then, continuing into Thailand and Hat Yai and then down the east coast of Malaysia back into Singapore. This trip is planned to be all about food and the bikes, with suitable and sustainable levels of drinking and sightseeing in between also. So if you are interested or know someone that might be, let me know.